"The earth is the Lord's and everything in it. The world and all its people belong to him. For he laid the earth's foundation on the seas and built it on the ocean depths." ~Psalm 24:1-2
As I share this update with you I am reminded that everything, belongs to Lord. Everything we have, and everything that we are. All of our time, and talents belong to the Lord. Also, our children belong to the Lord. A wise friend once said to me, "Rebekka we present our kids to the Lord in these beautiful ceremonies in front of family and friends, but are we really willing to let the Lord use these children in the way that he sees fit?" I thought for a moment. Was I willing? I mean I had sung the songs, prayed the prayers, "Oh Lord use me, use my life," But at what cost?
As we have watched Ethan have hundred's of seizures a day for the last two years, my prayers have changed. They had become, "Oh Lord please heal him." These prayers are not wrong by any means, but what if I wanted things my way? Trust was becoming an issue. Did he not hear me? Did he not hear the pleas of the countless people that were praying for Ethan? Well I believe that he did. But more than that I believe that Lord was right there walking with us through all of this. Another dear friend said to me, "We pray in our time and God answers in his time."
My faith is growing and I am learning so many new things. I am learning to seek that healer and not the healing. I know that God loves us to much to not let us grow through this.
The past few months have been challenging. The doctors once again said that they were out of options. No medication was working. So we weaned him off all medications. It was rough. The withdrawal seizures were unlike anything we had ever seen. They were intense, and sometime the rescue (emergency meds) didn't even work. But we know that the daily meds were only making him worse. So about six weeks after his last pill he had one week of seizure free days! It was amazing. We were overjoyed. But then the drop seizures returned. We continued to pray. I specifically was praying for direction. Then God sent another mom to me. A mom that had little boy with doose syndrome and had been on the ketogenic diet. She looked at Ethan's records and suggested changes in the diet. We slowly made those changes over many weeks. He started growing again. The drop seizures nearly all went away.
As of today it has been over a month since his last drop seizure, and 15 days since his last grand mal seizure. If we see any seizures they are only at night while he is sleeping. This last month has been amazing. One week ago we let him take off his helmet. (That was harder for mom and dad than Ethan. I don't think that we will ever forget watching him slam his head into things. But we know that this is the next step for both him and us.) He is growing and learning by leaps and bounds. We had forgotten how much a toddlers brain can take in when they are not seizing. He is learning his letter sounds, colors, and shapes. We are excited for what each new day brings.
Thank you so much to all of you who have been faithfully praying for Ethan, and our family. He is making big strides of improvement right now. We are down to just a few evening seizures. Keep the prayers coming. God is faithful in the good times and the hard times. May he bless you today.
Playing outside with no helmet!